Showing posts with label healing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label healing. Show all posts

Friday, April 13, 2012

Finding God in Adversity...

As much as I would have loved to have come up with this myself, this post was copied from the Cowboys-4-Christ Facebook page.  Please support them by "liking" their page.  




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A daughter complained to her father about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it, and wanted to give up. She was tired of all the fighting and struggling. It seemed as though in solving one problem, two more would arise.

Her father, took her to the kitchen. He filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to a boil.

In one he placed carrots,
in the second he placed eggs,
and the last he placed ground coffee beans.

He let them sit and boil without saying a word. The daughter impatiently waited, wondering what he was doing. In about twenty minutes he turned off the burners.

He fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl.
He pulled the eggs out and placed them a bowl.
Then he ladled the coffee out and poured it in a cup.

Turning to her he asked. "Darling, what do you see?" "Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied. He brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. He then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg. Finally, he asked her to sip the coffee. She smiled as she tasted its rich aroma.
She humbly asked. "What does it mean Father?"

He explained that each of them had faced the same adversity, boiling water, but each reacted differently. The carrots went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. But after being subjected to the boiling water, they softened and became weak.
The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior. But after sitting through the boiling water, the insides became hardened.

However, the ground coffee beans were unique. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water. 

"Which are you," he asked his daughter.
"When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond?
Are you a carrot,
an egg,
or a coffee bean?

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In the face of adversity, how do YOU respond?
Do you become weak?  Do you become strong?
Or do you do even more... and take that hardship, and turn it into something amazing.


Consider Bethany Hamilton, Nick Vujicic, or this little boy:



Those people are testaments to doing MORE than surviving.  Those people are like the "coffee" - they changed the atmosphere and the people around them - by sharing their stories (both the good things AND the hard things), and by going out and LIVING... out loud.

But, some scars people have are hidden... pushed deep down in a dark place so that they can manage each day without falling apart.  To these people I give my prayers and encouragement that they find, at least ONE person, to whom they can unburden themselves.  Because sometimes, all you need is to open the door a crack to start the healing.

A favorite show of mine is Grey's Anatomy.  In one of the episodes, the Chief of Staff stops one of his interns from wallowing in her perceived failures with this quote:
Chin up.  Put your shoulders back, walk proud, strut a little.
Don't lick your wounds; celebrate them.
The scars you bear are the signs of a competitor.
You're in a lion fight.  
Just because you didn't win [that time] doesn't mean you don't know how to roar.

The scars you have, whether they be physical, mental, or emotional, do NOT have to define you.  You are not broken.   And sometimes... many times... surviving = winning.  And you are never alone in your fight... God is with you.

God's the one who rebuilds Jerusalem, 
      who regathers Israel's scattered exiles. 
   He heals the heartbroken 
      and bandages their wounds. 
   He counts the stars 
      and assigns each a name. 
   Our Lord is great, with limitless strength; 
      we'll never comprehend what he knows and does. 
   God puts the fallen on their feet again 
      and pushes the wicked into the ditch.
Psalm 147:3 (MSG)

So when you are faced with a hardship, a problem, or a catastrophe, at the very least, try to be the egg - get stronger with each hard moment.  And eventually, you might find that you can become the coffee bean.  Because you can affect others with your strength, endurance, and perseverance.  That's #WINNING. 
:)


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Monday, April 9, 2012

A Squashed Sandwich... Part 2 of "A Fork In The Road"

This post is a follow-up to "The Fork In the Road" Discussion.  If you haven't read it yet, you should probably read that first. :)
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There was a girl in my 4th, 5th, and 6th grade classes in elementary school who, every day at lunch, would reach over with her fist, hover over someone's sandwich or bag of chips, and then slam her fist down - crushing the food flat underneath.  Since each grade level at my small school only had 15 kids in it - half of them girls, you pretty much HAD to sit with this bully (let's call her "Hester*") or face sitting alone in the cafeteria.  At least, I was safe in the knowledge that Hester was an equal-opportunity squasher; by statistics alone, I had a 6-in-7 chance of keeping my sandwich intact.  But at least one day every couple of weeks, I knew that I'd be eating squashed peanut butter & jelly - or have to forgo lunch altogether.  :(

I was thinking about this as I talked to people about my last blog post on purity and forks.  That post was largely concentrated on people who CHOOSE to have sex in high school (or younger - *sigh*), but I was reminded by more than one person, that there are too many girls (and boys, even) who have had sexual behaviors forced upon them without their consent.  I remember hearing statistics in my junior high sex education class: that 1-in-4 girls would be sexually assaulted in their lifetime.  (That was the mid-1980's).  And I remember looking around at my classmates thinking, "Surely that can't be right? - That would mean that, statistically, 2 of my female classmates could face that sometime!"


The current statistics are even more sobering-- and have moved to 1-in-3 vs. 1-in-4.  According to RAINN, 44% of rape victims are under age 18.  Every 2 minutes, someone in the U.S. is sexually assaulted.  And there is an average of 207,753 victims of sexual assault each year, aged 12 and older.  Approximately 2/3 of all assaults are committed by someone known to the victim, and 38% of rapists are a "friend" or acquaintance.


That means YES - quite possibly, that girl you sit next to in chemistry class... might be dealing with a friend-of-the-family hurting her.  The withdrawn girl on the bus... could be being molested by her uncle.  That "promiscuous" girl that everybody "knows"... may just be acting out because she has been raped already - so she figures why bother "protecting her virtue."  The goth girl who pushes everybody away... she is trying to be as "ugly" as possible so she won't be raped again.


And it's even quite possible that one of your friends - someone to whom you share your secrets (the boy you are crushing on, the math test you failed, the normal everyday angst of high school) has been stuffing down her own horrible secrets of abuse so that she can forget... just for a minute... and feel "normal" by listening to your "problems."  It is quite possible that you'll never know what horrors your friend faces each evening when she gets home from school


These kids-with-secrets didn't ASK to be raped... or assaulted... or abused.  Like my lunchtime sandwich smashed by Hester's angry fist, they were attacked by ruthless bullies who get off on the "power" of hurting other people.   And I imagine it would be easy for them to think that God does not care about them.  Like Jenny in Forrest Gump who prayed "Dear God... make me a bird... make me a bird so I can fly far, far away (from her abusive father)," these kids might be wondering WHY God allows this pain and suffering to happen at all.


I don't want my next words to sound empty or condescending or out-of-touch, but I truly believe that while God may not have unleashed a bolt of lightening to smite your attacker, He was with you - each horrible minute - crying with you and helping you endure... and survive.  While He will not stop a human, one of His children, from making a free-will choice, He is heartbroken when one of His children commits such an evil and horrible act upon another.  At the same time, he feels every ounce of pain and suffering and shame you experience.  God, as Jesus, felt pain, hopelessness, embarrassment, heartache, sickness, suffering, and more at the hand of Pontius Pilate and his angry mob.  And every day, when people are cruel and inhumane to other people, I believe he feels double the pain - the pain of the victim as well as the pain and brokenness of the deranged or sick perpetrator of the attack(s).


While God won't interfere with anyone's free will, I believe, if you ask Him, he will gladly offer strength, healing, peace, and comfort - by placing other people in your life who will lift you up and support you as you deal with certain horrors and memories.  You were NOT alone then... and you are NOT alone now.   Surround yourself with kind and caring friends and family - you don't have to continue to stuff down these secrets... because the people who truly love you will support you and allow you to unburden your mind to them.


And while you may feel dirty or soiled like the Sharpie'd up forks from the last blog post, I believe that when you give your life to Jesus, and when you give your burdens and your secrets over to God - not only does He clean your fork... He gives you a whole new one.


To the people who read this who are holding horrors in their minds from their childhood or after, I pray that you will find strength and peace and healing.


Most sincerely,
Mags


PS - April is Sexual Assault and Awareness Month.  To find out how you can help, please visit RAINN and read about 7 easy ways you can support Survivors of Abuse.




*Not her real name... exactly.
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Friday, April 29, 2011

It's okay to be Second...

When I was a first grade teacher, asking the kids to "line up" at the door was always comical.  First graders cannot just walk to the door.  They *must* run as fast as possible, elbowing every other child out of the way as they race to be FIRST!!  No matter how many times I sent a kid to the rear of the line to be the "Leader of the Back," I could always count on the fact that the next time we lined up, that same kid would again smash his or her way to the front of the line.  The desperate need to be first rarely lessoned.


Kids ALWAYS want to be FIRST.... And when you think about it... grown-ups usually want to be first too:  the first to get the glory, the big paycheck, the best house.  "Keeping up with The Joneses" is a never-ending competition for some families.


For example, we have some great friends who once built a house.  All of the other houses in their neighborhood were also newly-built and just had dirt yards.  Everyone was just trying to grow grass.  But our friends had a plan... in the middle of one fall night, under the cloak of darkness, our friends snuck outside and planted 100 daffodil bulbs.  They were hoping that come spring, while everyone sat back looking at "just grass," their house would have this EXPLOSION of COLOR as all of the daffodils sprung up, seemingly out of nowhere.  They would actually BE "The Joneses" for that brief moment.  Everyone in the neighborhood would want the yard with all of the bright and happy daffodils.


It still makes me giggle... imagining them sneaking out to plant all of those bulbs at midnight...!  But the need to be "first," can actually take completely rational, educated adults... and turn them into crazy people.



This week, I took Jack and Luke to see the movie, Soul Surfer.  It's the story of 13-year old Bethany Hamilton who, in October 2003, had her left arm eaten off by a shark while she was surfing.  Do you remember being 13?  The peer pressure?  The social angst?  I know that when I was 13, if I wore the wrong clothes to school, I was a complete mess.  I cannot imagine having the fortitude to just shrug off the stares of other people and say, "Yup... I am missing my arm... let's move on."  (or something similar!).  


Bethany credits her faith in Jesus for her amazing attitude.  Instead of wallowing in the "WHY ME?!!!!!" stage, she grabs her surfboard and figures out a way to surf one armed... enough that she wins a national championship just 2 years after her shark attack.  Since then, she has used her fame/notoriety/infamy to show God's love to others.  She has figured out that God had a plan for her all along - that He never abandoned her - and that He has allowed her to do more with one arm than she ever could have done with two.

Can you imagine the sheer number of people - kids and grown-ups alike - who have been inspired by her story?  People who have suffered incredible hardships or pain?  I know that I'm feeling a little less inclined to complain about stupid stuff... I keep hearing Woody's voice from Toy Story, "Did you hear what I said? I AM MISSING MY ARM!!!"   My frustrations or problems seem a little bit dumb when you compare them to this.  And when you compare your own issues to the major pain and suffering that Jesus experienced through the crucifixion?  Well... it's much easier to accept that "I am second."  GOD is first... He is in control... and He has a plan... for each and every one of us.


Bethany Hamilton figured out that she doesn't have to be first either.  She's willing to sit second to God and let Him work miracles through her.  Want to hear it in her own words?  




Do not be afraid.  I am the First and the Last.  I am the Living One.
I was dead.  But look!  I am alive forever and ever!  And I hold the keys to Death and Hell.
Revelation 1:17 

“So the last will be first, and the first will be last.”
Matthew 20:16

:) Mags
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Friday, March 11, 2011

God Heals.

A friend a link to this wonderful video on Facebook - it's about a little dog, Starfish, who suffered years and YEARS of horrible abuse before she was finally rescued and adopted by her forever family:


Think of all of the suffering this little pup endured... all of the painful days and undoubtedly sleepless nights... how the majority of her little life was probably miserable. But by the love of a family who wouldn't give up on her, she was able to run and jump and sleep peacefully for the remainder of her life.

When I saw this, I immediately thought of how God heals us. We can have years of doubt, anger, sin, isolation, questions, baggage, misery, and bad choices. We can literally be broken like the fragile bones in this little dog... Yet when we ask God into our hearts... when we reach out to Him.... His love and peace and understanding fills us with a healing that cannot be rivaled. Our sins are forgiven (again and again)... Our questions are answered... Our doubt, and anger, and isolation, and misery are enveloped by Him with a love that is so mighty it can heal our wounded hearts and minds and souls.

Psalm 103:3-4
Praise the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits- who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion...

God heals... no matter how severe our wounds. And I am so thankful for that!

Hoping that your wounds feel a little lighter after watching the video,
:) Mags
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